Child and Family Mental Health - Montgomery County, MD - Bethesda - Maryland - Child Therapist - Teen Adolescent Therapy Counseling - Washington, DC

Quality Therapy for You, Your Child, and Your Family

3930 Knowles Avenue :: Suite 200 and Suite 206 :: Kensington, MD 20895
phone: 301-466-9526 :: email us

  • Home
  • Services
    • Family Therapy
    • Couples Therapy
    • Individual Therapy
    • Play Therapy
    • Group Therapy
    • Referral and Advocacy
    • Parenting Consultations
    • Psychological Consultations and Evaluations
  • Forms
  • Our Clinicians
    • Jonah Green, LCSW-C
    • Ricardo “Ric” Andrews, LGPC
    • Heidi Cohen, LCSW-C, CGABS
    • Ashley Copeland, LCMFT
    • Katherine Doyle, LMSW
    • Jingshuai Du, Ph.D., LGMFT
    • Chris Erb, LGMFT
    • Jennifer Firestone, LCSW-C
    • Shannon Golub, MSW Student Intern
    • Paul Higgins, JD, LMSW
    • Sheva Melmed, LCSW-C
    • Yasmin Meyers, LCSW-C
    • Lori Rothfeld, JD, LMSW
    • Annie C. Scheiner, LCMFT
    • Abigail Schwartz, JD, LCSW-C
    • Farah Shirazi, LMSW
    • Jess Silbermann, LCSW-C
    • Kathy Voglmayr, LCSW-C
  • Blog
  • Resources For Families
    • Supports and Services for Children and Families
    • Recommended Providers for Children, Adolescents and Families
    • Recommended Books and Other Media
  • Resources For Clinicians
  • Contact

Welcome to Our Blog!

This blog is written by the clinicians at Jonah Green and Associates, a mental health practice based in Kensington, MD that provides quality services for children, teens, families, and adults. It is intended as a resource for families who are seeking to expand their knowledge about mental health and mental health services, and also as a resource for families who are seeking quality mental health services, especially in the mid-Atlantic region. Please feel free to post questions and comments on any of the entries as well as on any topics or articles from our companion web site www.childandfamilymentalhealth.com.

October 5, 2017

Games to Teach Young Children Impulse Control and Self-Regulation

Impulse control and self-regulation are a large part of many therapies with young children who have difficulty with waiting, stopping, following directions, and accepting limits.  These skills are part of a larger set of abilities called the “executive functions,” which include emotion regulation, organization, attention, inhibiting one’s actions, and time management.  Research shows that the area of the brain responsible for these complex tasks, the pre-frontal cortex, continues to develop into one’s mid-twenties.  No wonder our little ones are still learning and growing and in these areas!  With practice and persistence, we can help our little ones gain connections and strengthen executive functions.  The games below are used to do just that.

The Waiting Game

This clever game gives children the chance to learn the ever-challenging skill of waiting.

  1. Pick a space clear of distractions, and allow your child to pick an enticing toy with several components to it. I like to use a train track with many cars, or a box of sand with a bucket of toy animals.
  2. Allow your child to pick two or three small toys to play with at a time (2 or three trains or animals, for example). Keep most of the toys in your control, just behind your back or on a higher surface.
  3. Set up a timer and tell them they are allowed to play freely with their chosen toys until the timer goes off, at which point they can pick 2-3 more toys.
  4. While they wait, teach them that they can have fun with what they already have! Engage and distract them with the toys they do have and remind that they will have to wait for more. Point to the timer and let them know how much time is left.  If they reach for more toys before the timer goes off, gently remind them that you know it is hard, but that they are practicing waiting.
  5. Congratulate your child when they successfully wait for extra toys.

 

Hands Up

This is a fun game for little ones who just can’t seem to keep their hands off things.

  1. Give them toys they love and practice saying “hands up,” every 30 to 90 seconds.
  2. When they look at you and put their hands up, give them a big smile and praise them for listening! This will help next time you are in Ikea or Safeway and little hands start to go astray.

Simon Says or Red Light/Green Light

  • These games require careful listening and a whole lot of self-control. Bonus, they get kids up and moving around.

Deep Breathing with Bubbles/Balloons

  • To reduce impulses and self-soothe, try encouraging deep breathing. This sends signals from the body to the brain to help calm down. Encourage your children to blow bubbles or try to blow up a balloon. They don’t have to get it just right (they often can’t blow up balloons just yet), but the action will help them experience deep breathing.  They will then be able to “pretend” they are blowing bubbles in the future.

Elmo’s “Belly Breathing” Song

  • Elmo’s Belly Breathing song can be very helpful for children who are a bit older and can make the connection between feeling angry and taking belly breaths to soothe themselves and reduce their impulses.

Rewards

  • Reward systems can be helpful to reinforce and eliminate specific behaviors. For young children, it is most helpful to connect one behavior (i.e., keep your hands to yourself) with one reward (i.e., a cookie or 3 M&M’s).
  • To encourage multiple positive behaviors throughout the day, I recommend breaking the day down into discrete chunks (breakfast, lunch, snack, and dinner, for example) and use those times as “checkpoints” to see if the child has been following their rule.  For example, if the rule is “you have to keep your hands to yourself to earn 1 mini Oreo,” check in at these times to see if your child has earned their treat. If they have earned their treat, give them their reward, say a few encouraging words, and remind them they have a chance for another treat in a few hours if they follow their rule.  If they don’t earn it, say “Oh looks like you didn’t keep your hands to yourself, let’s try to earn again next time.” No long lectures needed!
  • Of course, it is important for parents to help their children build internal motivation to manage their impulses through love, support, and fruitful conversation. Many little ones, however, are striving to manage very strong impulses, and external rewards can offer them the structure they need to be successful.

–Posted by Laurie Chaikind

Share this:

  • Facebook
  • LinkedIn
  • Twitter

Filed Under: ADHD, Child Development, Managing Mood and Regulating Emotions, Parenting Tagged With: Laurie Chaikind, parenting, self-regulation

Connect with Us

  • Email
  • Facebook
  • LinkedIn
  • Twitter

Subscribe to Our Blog

Enter your email address to subscribe to this blog and receive notifications of new posts by email.

RECENT POSTS

  • A Shared Space for Healing: Family Therapy for Addiction
  • Finding Trauma Treatment for Children in Your Care
  • For This New Year’s Resolution, Consider Adding a Self-Compassion Goal 
  • Understanding and Combating Anxiety
  • Increasing Our Wellbeing by Connecting with the Earth

Resources

  • Child and Family Mental Health Web Site
  • Co-parenting Resources
  • E-Group for Parents of School-age Children with Special Needs
  • Find a Therapist in Metro DC
  • Good Therapy Web Site
  • Help for your Anxious Child
  • Help for Your Depressed Teen
  • Resources For Families with Teens and Adults with Developmental Disabilities in Montgomery County, MD
  • Resources for Parents in Metro DC area
  • Setting Limits on Your Kids' Screen Time
  • Support for ADHD
  • Support for Stepfamilies
  • What to Expect from a Therapist

Topics

  • Addiction
  • ADHD
  • Adolescence and Young Adults
  • Adoption
  • Anxiety
  • Child Development
  • children and schools
  • communication
  • Couples
  • Disability and families
  • Families and Society
  • Family Therapy
  • General
  • Grief and Loss
  • Health
  • Managing Mood and Regulating Emotions
  • mental health
  • Parenting
  • Relationships
  • Self-Care
  • Separation, Divorce, and Stepfamilies
  • sexuality
  • Siblings
  • Social Media
  • Therapy
  • Trauma
  • Uncategorized

Jonah Green and Associates, LLC

Jonah Green and Associates, LLC is a highly regarded group of mental health clinicians who treat children, teens, and families with a variety of emotional, behavioral, and relationship concerns... read more
verified by Psychology Today verified by Psychology Today Directory Jonah Green - Wiser

RECENT POSTS

  • A Shared Space for Healing: Family Therapy for Addiction
  • Finding Trauma Treatment for Children in Your Care
  • For This New Year’s Resolution, Consider Adding a Self-Compassion Goal 
  • Understanding and Combating Anxiety
  • Increasing Our Wellbeing by Connecting with the Earth

Connect with Us

  • Email
  • Facebook
  • LinkedIn
  • Twitter

SEARCH

Serving Maryland, Montgomery County, Kensington, Rockville, Silver Spring, Bethesda, Chevy Chase and Washington, DC

2023 © Jonah Green and Associates - Child and Family Mental Health
Website Design by: VanStudios